Mike and Dave are joined by “Officer Butthurt” who regales us with the most epic poop tale known to man. Have a better one? Share it by joining our patreon for just $1/month where you’ll get full video version of podcasts plus extra content and rewards. Obviously you can comment here but it isn’t the full story for comparison 🙂
PATREON: http://www.patreon.com/mikethecop
LISTEN TO FULL EPISODE FOR FREE:
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/off-the-cuff/id1273632144?mt=2
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/mike-the-cop/the-greatest-poop-story-of-all-time-off-the-cuff-episode-8
OFFICER BUTTHURT did not wish to have his face on camera and if you don’t see this in the description and comment on it below, you run the risk of merciless mocking.
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INTRO MUSIC: “You Hear Dat” by https://www.instagram.com/bookem_382/
** (Disclaimer: This video content is intended for educational and informational purposes only) **
Alright folks, despite the fact that I have been posting blatantly titled "CLIPS" of my podcast on YouTube for a couple of months now, this one seems to have stirred the pot more than normal. So, I'll address that here in a pinned comment:
1. I am blatant about it. I have a Patreon where the full video + all kinds of other extras are available. I don't apologize for that. Time, energy and equipment isn't free to grow the quality and quantity of content. It's that simple. Besides, almost all of my video content from the last couple of years I've been doing videos are completely open and available for free anyway. It's only the full podcast that isn't.
2. I will not lose sleep over the fact some people cannot read 🙂 I post in the description that the full audio of the podcast is available on iTunes or SoundCloud….for FREE. If you're too lazy to go listen, then you probably already aren't the kind of person who would like my content. That's ok, you don't have to watch my stuff or follow me. 96% of my YouTube videos are available with no extras posted elsewhere and most "clips" as I have titled them are mostly self-contained as its own video anyway.
3. I may choose to simply put no clips up of the podcast at all on YouTube as a platform but rather just mention that I have a podcast and people that want to go watch or listen can.
But at the end of the day, I stand behind my content and future plans for it and appreciate all of you who have helped support and encourage me along the way. I continue to make content for you to enjoy 🙂 For the haters, you help me to grow to so come back and invite your friends.
This is your crappiest video.
I have a personal greatest poop story, not sure if it can top this though. Long story short, and I mean a literal long story, when I went through Air Force Basic Training I was so stressed out that I went a whole 16 days without pooping. Ended up having to go to the hospital where I was prescribed two different kinds of laxatives, a stool softener, and a painkiller because according to the doctor, “It’s going to hurt coming out… This will alleviate some of the pain.†I was up all night birthing the behemoth growing inside of me. Trust me when I say, that’s cutting the story way down!
Sellout
Oh I love dave
Terrible how many YouTubers have to rely on Patreon
Got a question for you Mike the cop have you ever been hated buy family for pursuing a career in law enforcement 😥 ps thanks for the video I could use some cheering up
These videos make up for the shitty news stories on my social media feeds. This is my go to channel for a laugh or a lesson. Thanks Mike. Stay blessed.
Comfortably and safely sitting on my toilet shitting while watching this. Made things easier. lmao
Hi Mike.
I just watched the following video:
https://youtu.be/jAfUI_hETy0
Is is accurate?
You should try to talk with AfterPrisonShow, I think it could make some interesting videos
Mike react to this please https://youtu.be/jAfUI_hETy0
Well played Sir… Great marketing move! While saddened I applaud your creativity to increase patreon!
I'm in college, and I've literally done that walk a mile to campus before.
Sorry, I donate money when I feel like it, not when I'm coerced. I even bought a Texas Proud T-shirt because I apprecaited what that effort supported. Unsubscribing. It was fun while it lasted.
Why do police officers wear different colored uniforms? Does it have to do with rank or where you work? The most common uniforms I see are black and white, so I don't know if there are other colors, but this is just something that came to mind.
Really.. so you start a story and end it on a paid site? BS, unsub
Mike, are people that dumb or are they too lazy to read the description and watch it on a different platform for free? I guess all that clicking must be tiresome.
Ive had lots of those has mat shits.
Hey +Mike the Cop, thanks for commenting under my video, but when are you going to explain how you have the authority to decide which laws you will and will not enforce, and against whom? Do you only ticket black people, or just anyone you do not like in general? How do you get to ignore the laws of the legislature if the person who broke the law is your friend? Thanks! 🙂
Oh and looking back at some of your older videos Michigan represent! 🤘
Great story, made for a good night on shift. I even liked all the lead up banter between everyone. You do a great job and I want to thank you for providing it for free on soundcloud.
Hey Mike, are there any limitations on police officers having body art?
Watching in 144p I couldn't tell which of the gentlemen sat side by side was Mike
Can you answer the question: Why do cops scream Taser, Taser when they deploy a taser?
Why does Mike only ticket people he doesn't like? Is that prejudiced? Why doesn't he ticket everyone who breaks the law? https://youtu.be/kmJMHJ8zS4o
I think I received an anti cop ad before this vid. NRA I think it was.
*edit No wrong ad, it was saying to use guns to shoot protestors.
I have IBS(irritable bowel syndrome) so I can relate to any poop story so much.
Mike what's your thought about a " I love fire fighters" T-shirt
Mike, I appreciate the content you provide and the fact that so much of YouTube has been demonetized but I resent the fact that you start this story and use it to try and get people to sign up for Patreon. Â This is right up there with click bait and transexual hookers…..for shame!
Extortion!!!
Bald cop meets Bald cop… coming soon to theaters near you.
We really need new names for these people.
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Help for Law Enforcement
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Research has revealed a strong connection between occupational stress and alcohol and drug abuse, but also a strong sub-cultural more among police officers that encourages drinking both for social and stress-reduction purposes. Alcohol consumption among police officers is also correlated with officer suicides and domestic violence, and many departments are beginning to recognize the liability in allowing this problem to go untreated.
Information
Just putting out out there
THE NFL is paying for protesting players. And Good. I don’t think all cops are bad. But if you ever help a Bad cop out of the mess he gets into Are you any better then he is. They say one bad apple. Right. And where can a cop go if the top commanders are the worst of the bunch ? Look at the FBI now James Comey is the face of law enforcement.
F##k, I need a drink, and I'm almost off
At the precinct, it's like an AA meeting all gone wrong
I.A. got an eye, on my close friend guy for taking a supply from evidence from a bust on a buy
That doesn't concern me, we never rat on each other
We went through the academy, just like frat brothers.
Now I'm on my way, back to the station to check out
So I can go home, relax, take a drink and think about my abrupt change, out of the clean, to the corrupt
Lookin through the eye of the ###, I'm all f##ked.
It’s kinda like cypress hill
Has friends in the LAPD
That help with the Lyrics. IDK
How do you feel about all these people being arrested in Brittain for expressing themselves on the internet?
That's low life man! If you are going to show it here … finish it! Â Or just show it on patreon
The caveat at the end is Shitty. Sad to see.
I think I've heard one even better (if that's possible): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VRTYVHErSM
I love how mad people get when you ask for support for content you make on your own dime. (especially since it says you can watch for if free in the description) If I'm correct, "back in the day" you had to pay for your comedy and information through monthly cable fees to watch content on TV channels 😂 Now that the internet supplies everything for free, people feel entitled to it. Keep doing what you're doing man. I'm new to your channel, but love the videos, and LOVE your replies to these comments haha. I hope to be able to support you on patreon sometime!
Can you explain "decriminalization" of a substance? Such as Marijuana in some states?
When could you be arrested in a state for a decriminalized substance? If a cop SMELLED weed for example, could they knock on the door and demand a search with probable cause? What is the furthest they could go?
I love your videos, long time subscriber <3
i really enjoyed mikes videos before, but for the past couple of weeks it basically just became a trailer show for patreon. yes, i know. times are hard, but i simply don't have the money to pay for a video or 2 a week when i can get more interaction and content by supporting people on twitch. =/
Legitimate question, why are so many cops bald?
Omg lmao! I at least have keys to various buildings doing security. I can't breathe from laughing.
Mike the fireman doesn't charge a dollar to finish shit stories.
Overdrafts a dollar to finish the story.
Gets asked why he over drafted
Oh you know just wanted to hear a "crappy story"
Who watched while eating hamburgers and mashed potatoes?